I designed my engagement ring, and every time I look at it I love it. Then it came to adding the wedding ring to fit with this ring I enjoy so much.
There we hit a snag....I thought it looked silly. The wedding ring and engagement ring just didn't work together. I thought, I wonder if I can cut the ring in half and have two rings, so they will sit one on each side of the engagement ring. The jeweller said l could do whatever l wanted, so that’s what we did. Now I have two wedding rings.
It’s true- you can do whatever you want. Wedding rings are not part of the legal requirements to get married, but they are a long held tradition that most couples go with.
Generally both partners exchange wedding rings during their wedding ceremony. Often one of three things is said
- Will you wear this ring? A question, like when you got engaged.
- Wear this ring. A statement, given that the rings usually follow the vows, at this stage they have already said ‘yes’
- Someone else (aka Celebrant) says ‘wear these rings’
Wedding rings are usually described as representing the endless of true love, having no beginning and no end.
Most people in Australia wear it on the fourth digit on the left hand. In ancient times it was thought that a vein ran directly from this finger to the heart.
Whilst wedding rings hold thousands of years of tradition, if they are meaningless to you – don’t make them part of your day. It’s your wedding and you really should have only the symbols that you find important.
Beautiful wedding rings often come with large price tags. You might find that at this stage in your life that money might be better spent on a holiday, house deposit or the wedding.
If you still want to exchange something; what about a necklace, watch or even get matching tattoos.
Like all rituals within a ceremony, a Wedding Ring only represents what you believe it stands for.
If it means something to you – then great; l know an awesome jeweller.
If a wedding ring is not for you – then let’s chat about what you do want in your wedding ceremony, because guess what ... you too can do whatever you want!
This week, Jennifer Aniston and Justin Theroux surprised guests with a wedding disguised as a birthday party. As reported by ET:
"The intimate affair was held in front of 70 of their closest friends and family, including Howard Stern, Jason Bateman, Lisa Kudrow, Chelsea Handler, John Krasinski, Emily Blunt,
Whilst this doesn't sound like my idea of low key or minimum fuss, l have been involved in a many Surprise Weddings over the years and admit l am quite a fan. Here are a few reasons why:
You get to decide everything
We've all been there. Someone you know says “I'm getting married” and after the hugs and hi-fives comes the
“l know a florist”,
“you should use my make up artist”,
“what ever you do, don’t (insert personal opinion here)”
What the happy couple see as their ideal way to get married get’s torn to strips and they are suddenly planning their parents/aunts/best friend’s perfect day.
When you keep it a surprise you get to decide the who, what and where. After all, it is Your Wedding.
(Please note - when l say "Your Wedding" l mean you AND your fiancé. Weddings where one party to the marriage had no prior knowledge are against the law in Australia. The bride and groom need to both give 30 days notice and full consent.)
"Our wedding captured the essence of who Stephen and I were. We felt the ceremony was the perfect length and our guests loved how we focused on Stephen first and then surprised everyone with the wedding ceremony."
Reduce the drama
Ok – so l am not going to say that Surprise Weddings are without drama. But l will say that drama can be reduced by limiting the lead time people have to create it.
Make sure the important people will be there. This might mean spilling the beans to a stubborn parent or noncommittal friend to ensure they make the effort.
It probably goes without saying, but be realistic about whether any of your guests would be unhappy with your union. If there is doubt that someone would make a scene, would you really want them at your wedding anyway?
There are certain expectations we all have about attending a wedding. There will be food and refreshments. There will be some formal part. There will probably be a cake, flowers, seating arrangements, confetti, speeches, high-heels, first dance, beef or chicken and so on and so on. Without even realising, we all expect certain things when we attend a wedding.
However, if you think you are attending a housewarming or engagement party and all you expect is a sausage in bread and a beer or two – what a complete BONUS if you get to witness someone you love getting married.
"The surprise on everyone’s face was just perfect. It was the best way to get married"
Surprises are Fun
Planning your wedding can be a really special time for you as a couple. The excitement of watching things fall into place and the anticipation of the reaction of your loved ones is heightened with a Surprise Wedding.
It certainly is one way to ensure your guests will be talking about your day for many years to come.
So far l have been a Yogalates Instructor, Life Coach, Neighbour, Bike Buddy
and old school friend.
What alas would l need to have at your surprise wedding?
I get quite invested in my couples big day, some say I shouldn't, but it breaks my heart when someone's wedding is marred by a supplier not doing the job they were hired for. I have been to so many weddings and along the way I have learnt a lot about planning this special occasion. It is all about assembling a team of professionals around you that will show up and work for you.
Here are a few tips to help you to gather the suppliers that will help you to have the celebration you want:
Where did you find them?
A great way to find the best suppliers is to ask people you know and trust. If someone has had a celebration recently and loved their supplier find out who it was. Knowing the service and quality you receive before contacting a supplier gives you a starting point. For example, l am part of an awesome group of local wedding businesses and because l know them all personally, when l refer them to my couples l know exactly the high level of service they will receive.
Have you met them?
Researching and googling a business is one thing, but meeting them in person is so important. Businesses can and do write whatever they like on their website. Meeting a supplier in person can put a face to a voice/email but also helps you decide if they are the right person to be helping you with your day.
Did they impress you?
If the supplier turned up late, are forgetful or they wont take the time to meet you, then chances are you don't want them working for you.
Do they do what you need done?
Everyone wants something different for their wedding so finding the supplier that can provide your preference is important. If you want glamorous wedding photos, you will need a different photographer than if you just want 100 photos on a usb. If you want a personalised ceremony, you will need a different celebrant than one that is happy to just insert your name into their script.
I’ve booked them, what now?
After you have booked your supplier, don't feel bad if you want to ask lots of questions and being clear that your needs will be met. Get everything in writing so that there is no confusion on what is included and agreed on. Find out the timings of the task they are completing. For example, if your guests will be arriving at 6pm, confirm that the DJ needs to be set up by this time and find out how long their set up takes.
Touching base with your supplier regularly is a great way to ensure everything is on track. This could be as simple as following their Facebook page. Nothing would be more stressful than in the weeks, days or hours before your wedding discovering they are no longer in business or can’t be contacted.
Marriage is a choice we make every day.
A wedding is the special day you stand up in front of your closest friends and family and tell the world that this is the person you want to spend the rest of your life with. It’s pretty awesome!
After the wedding comes the business of being married – and marriage is a choice we make every day.
Whether you meet for the first time at the altar like of the recent reality show, Married at First Sight, you have known each other since Kinder or met at Roulette in Las Vegas; you make a choice to stay or go.
Most days, weeks and years – you don’t have to make this choice consciously. You love your partner, most of us are lucky to also be ‘in love’ with our partner and you build a life together. Some days it is a decision you make; to work through the problems, to communicate and to sacrifice for each other.
As a Civil Celebrant l don’t have to ask couples if they are in love. I don’t check their bank statements to see if they are financial fit for married life. I definitely do not enquire about their bedroom antics. Marriage is a choice available to any heterosexual couple whether they have been together 30 days or 80 years and no-one judges their lifestyle choices.
Marriage is a choice. An option that should be available to every person who wants to give this form of commitment a go. Not everyone wants to get married, but if you want to – then no-one should be able to stop you based on the gender of your love.
It is a really exciting time for Marriage Equality in Australia. Most of us, the run-of-the-mill married heterosexuals, have thought it was crazy a law exists that excludes LGBT couples from marrying. Although we believe it should be changed few of us have actually done anything about it. Here is your chance to do something.
Thankfully on Monday a Private Member’s Bill will be read in Parliament which will start the process towards Marriage Equality in Australia.
You can and should support this bill at http://www.itstimeformarriageequality.org.au/
This is not an argument. This is not up for discussion and unless you are a LGBT you don't get to disagree - because THIS is not about YOUR marriage.
This about giving all people the right to make a choice.
You have an opinion? Share it below
“Relaxed” is the most common word l hear from couples to describe their perfect wedding.
However, not many achieve this quite as well as Lauren and Lyall.
The day chosen for their commitment ceremony turned out to be a sunny 22 degrees and their hopes for a beach wedding came to fruition. Lauren had bought a beautiful dress of the rack, Lyall was wearing his new ‘work’ suit and they travelled with their six guests to the location less than 5km from their home.
I had introduced Lauren to a local photographer, Erin and Friends, who was able to capture stunning photos of their day.
Everyone was calm and Lauren was the most stress-free bride l have seen in a long time.
The ceremony was personal and romantic, exactly what they had wanted and perfectly suited to them as a couple.
After the ceremony Lauren and Lyall popped a bottle of Champagne (plus a bottle of non-alcoholic bubbles for the pregnant bride) and toasted their new union with the six most important people in their lives.
This toast and the conversation that followed were the absolute highlights of the wedding for me. So often l see couples bombarded with hundreds of guests congratulating them and then they rush off leaving their own party for hours to capture photos of their day. Lauren and Lyall were able to stay and just enjoy the moment.
Days later l caught up with them again to officially make them husband and wife. What could be more relaxed than signing your marriage certificate at your dining room table.
Did you have or are you planning a RELAXED wedding?
Comment below with your tips on how to be Stress-Free on your Big Day
It was important for Te-Ata and Jay to be married by the water so this local couple chose the gorgeous Point Cook Homestead as the location for their ceremony.
With views back across the bay to the city, they exchanged vows in front
of their close friends and family.
Awesome photos by Tracie at TLC Photography - check out her facebook page here
All this romance over the weekend led me to sit down and check out my wedding photos.
Do you know what l love about my wedding photos? They are of my husband, my friends, my family and me. There are no photos of the florist, though she did a great job. There are no photos of the venue manager; because he was a grumpy old bloke and there are none framed on my wall of my minister despite being a good friend; it was not his wedding.
Looking at the photos reminds me of the day and the special people who are still an important part of our lives.
I always tell couples who are getting married that l want to be as memorable as the table decorations at their wedding reception. As in, l should not be the ‘thing’ they or others remember about the ceremony. Instead they should remember that they laughed and cried, that the you laughed and cried and that it was a perfect reflection of you.
Because, you know what? I have had ‘my day’. I have my own wedding photos;
l don’t need to be the centre of yours!
The colourful bathing boxes on Aspendale Beach, Melbourne Victoria were the backdrop for
Lynda and Adam’s beach wedding.
The relaxed couple celebrated their nuptials in front of a small gathering of friends and family. Flanked by their four sons, three flower girls and two best friends, Lynda and Adam laughed and joked throughout the morning.
It was a very hot day which took its toll on their 18 month old twins who weren’t really sure what all the fuss was about. In fact, as Adam was placing the ring on Lynda’s finger and declaring “let this ring be a symbol of the lifelong bond between us” he looked down at his sons clinging to his legs and added “l’m not sure we need the ring for that”.
It was that down-to-earth nature that endeared me to Adam and Lynda from the very first meeting
and made their wedding day such a personal occasion.
To read more of what this couple and others have to say, check out my Google Plus page or Facebook Page.
If you are looking for a fun celebrant for your beach wedding or celebration,
send an enquiry here or call
Alicia and Aaron met on the way to a Tupperware party and like the company motto goes, it was "For Life".
Their wedding was held at the in Taylors Lakes and the ceremony near the rotunda on site.
It was a simple and relaxed ceremony made special by the inclusion of their children and dedication to their parents.
A bonus of this wedding was getting to work with the very professional Brenton Spiteri from
Extreme Exposure Photography. As you can see, his work is first class.
It was so great getting to know Alicia and Aaron and being part of their special day.
Call me to discuss your Wedding or Event
My gorgeous couple from the weekend made the local paper with their unique wedding. Check out the article here: