I have to admit that l was disappointed to read that l didn’t make the Easy Weddings top 100 Celebrants in Melbourne list.
 
Until I realised that I was not eligible!  Yes, I’m a celebrant, yes I’m in Melbourne, yes I am Top 100 material!  (let’s be honest I’m Top 10 material! )
 
To be eligible for this list I needed to be advertising with Easy Weddings  (my ad is here), and I needed to be advertising in the Melbourne category.  I’m not.
 
Don’t get me wrong, there are a heap of great celebrants in this list. Some of whom are really good friends of mine who l recommend.

​What disappoints me about a list like this, or the various Industry Awards and the advertising surrounding them is that there is limited transparency of how the recipients got there. How are the general public (that’s you) meant to know if it is a genuine list.
 
Now it might sound like I’m just spitting chips because I’m not on this list.  That’s not what’s getting my goat – the thing that annoys me most is that it’s not clear how they come up with these lists.
 
Who votes?
How much did they pay to be considered?
Did they also pay to attend the award ceremony, cough up for their own little statue and A4 print?
How big was the pool of competition?
 
According to the Attorney General’s website, there are currently 2106 celebrants in Victoria and the best thing about that number is that EVERYONE can find a celebrant that suits them. There are fun, serious, traditional, wacky, comedian, young, old, male, female, local or recommended.  Your top 100 celebrants is going to look a lot different to someone else’s list because everyone wants someone different to make their day unique.

​So for me, more important than paying to be on a list or hassling you for votes to win an award, is that l am on your list. ​

A contributor to your special day who did exactly what she said she would and exceeded your expectations by creating YOUR perfect ceremony.
 
So next time you are reading a Top whatever list – stop and think:
 
“What are you going to do to get on my list?”

Yes, you - I'm talking to you. Don’t do it!  

I mean, sure get married – I'm all for that that part –
just don't do it at 3pm on a Saturday! 

What do you have against Sunday or Friday night,  or  - heaven help us - Wednesday?
​
According to a recent survey by Easy Weddings, 62% of Australian weddings in 2016 were on Saturday, then Friday was the next popular with 15% and poor Monday only had 2%.* OK, we kind of understand the reluctance to celebrate on a Monday. 

I get that the traditional Saturday 3pm is probably convenient for some of the population. For those that have office jobs it means that there is no need to take time off work; you get the morning to get ready, and most importantly,
the Sunday to recover.
​
However statistics show that less than 30% of the population work in a Monday to Friday 9-5 job. Think shop assistants, firefighters, nurses and Mums!   E
ven so, this is your BIG DAY, surely if you gave your loved ones 6 months notice
​they would take a day off.

In my experience, most couples don't know what day of the week it is when they tie the knot, either because they have taken time off to prepare, or simply because
​they are in their own bubble of celebrations.

So it is possible to have a non-Saturday 3pm wedding – but why would you?

Well, to start most venues have more dates available mid-week as well as a mid-week discount. Some venues are booked during wedding season 2 years in advance – how ever going mid-week might mean you get your dream location sooner than you thought. You will also get your pick of other suppliers too; the hairdresser,  that photographer, the florist. 

During the week there will be less messing about with family and sport commitments. In fact, there will be less traffic around venues during the day. Have you ever tried to get a park at the beautiful Fitzroy Gardens when there is a blockbuster at the G?  

Flights for your guests and honeymoon will be cheaper mid-week too.
And also more accommodation options.

The bottom line is – if you friends and family are excited that you are getting married – they will want to be there and celebrate with you – no matter what day it is!
​
And besides, everyone loves a good excuse to take the day off work don't they? ​

WHAT WOULD IT TAKE FOR YOU TO GET MARRIED ON A MONDAY??
​​Leave your comment below!

* Easy weddings 2016

Some people can remember the first song that was playing when they met. Not these guys. Granted it was probably Incy Wincy Spider or Twinkle Twinkle since Maree and Matt first met in Kindergarten. The saw each other now and then as the years went by but it wasn’t until a chance meeting at the local pub on a Friday night 7 years ago that their really relationship began. Now, having just bought their first home and ready to start a family, they couldn't wait to get their families together and celebrate their wedding.

Eynesbury Homestead is a stunning Bluestone that was built in the 1870s. Maree and Matt lived locally and loved the multitude of options for photos available for them on site. Their reception was held in the Garden Event Marquee where they partied long into the night. 

Shantelle and Brett have been together for 24 years. They have adult children and have been through a lot together but decide that it was 'about time' they got married.

Having just moved to Geelong, Shantelle and Brett loved the waterfront and decided to have their ceremony on the pier before jumping on the Geelong Party Boat, The Hygeia for their reception cruising the harbour. 

Shantelle and Brett decided on a Gangster theme for their wedding and I loved putting together an outfit to compliment their celebrations. Brett looked 'The Real McCoy' in his pinstripe suit and red braces and tie.
Rather than selecting two people from their group of guests, we did a short quiz during the ceremony and the 'winners' had the honour of signing their marriage certificates. It was a fun addition to the occasion.
Congratulations Shantelle and Brett

​Melissa and Ruben are a super relaxed pair that met through work. They wanted a short and chilled ceremony without long drawn out stories of how they met or what marriage means; you know the ones!  They were looking for a fun celebration to get the job done!

 The Sunken Garden at Queen's Park (Moonee Ponds) was chosen for it's greenery and easy access between their home in the Northern suburbs and the CBD reception which was to follow. They enlisted the help of Melbourne company Ceremonies l Do for the white carpet, matching chairs, umbrellas and service of refreshments. To top it all off, they had the experts at The Road Stall add a gorgeous floral arbour.

 Melissa and Ruben chose to include a Quote Flash Mob into their ceremony to keep their guests on their toes.
​My favourite quote was read with style by Ruben's mate, Will
​"Loving is like peeing in your pants - everyone can see it but only you can feel the warmth"

Public Recognition
Marriage: the legally or formally recognized union of a man and a woman (or, in some jurisdictions,
​two people of the same sex) as partners in a relationship. (thanks Google dictionary) 
​

Commitment
Commitment means staying loyal to what you said you were going to do long after the mood you said it in has left you. Weddings are a celebration of that commitment and the memories of that day can be a lasting reminder.
An Awesome Reason for a Party
Bad things happen in our world and most families complain that the only time they ever see each other is at funerals. Why not celebrate something positive?
Love, commitment and devotion!

​Share names
So many of my couples have kids or are planning to have them soon and see marriage as a way to officially bond their family together. Brides are often exciting to be finally sharing surnames with their partner and the kids

Marriage is just a piece of paper, but so is a cheque for $1 million dollars or a winning lottery ticket .
They all are only worth the value that YOU give them.
I value marriage – l see it as choice l made and a choice l continue to make every day. Not everyone puts the same value on the marriage “piece of paper' but as Virginia Woolf once said 

Recently a couple asked me to marry them and l said no.
Not because they don’t love each other – they clearly do.
Not because they wouldn't make good parents -  they already have two beautiful sons.
Not because they don’t  suit, get along, work well or complement each other -
​since everyone that knows them would say they are perfect together.
I had to say no because their union is not recognised in Australia. 

When Australia finally catches up with the rest of the world, we will make Jilda and Tanya’s marriage legal ​(it’s a free service l offer all my same-sex unions) but for now, we can say they got hitched and they DID IT with class & style. 
Congratulations Jilda and Tanya xx

Thanks to Jilda and Tanya for allowing me to share their story.
Event Hire = www.weddinghiremelbourne.com
Photography = www.johnlimphotography.com.au
Reception = www.brightonsavoy.com.au

I designed my engagement ring, and every time I look at it I love it.  Then it came to adding the wedding ring to fit with this ring I enjoy so much. 
There we hit a snag....I thought it looked silly.  The wedding ring and engagement ring just didn't work together.   I thought, I wonder if I can cut the ring in half and have two rings, so they will sit one on each side of the engagement ring.     The jeweller said l could do whatever l wanted, so that’s what we did. Now I have two wedding rings.   

It’s true- you can do whatever you want. Wedding rings are not part of the legal requirements to get married, but they are a long held tradition that most couples go with.

Two rings
Generally both partners exchange wedding rings during their wedding ceremony. Often one of three things is said

-      Will you wear this ring? A question, like when you got engaged.
-      Wear this ring. A statement, given that the rings usually follow the vows, at this stage they have already said ‘yes’
-      Someone else (aka Celebrant) says ‘wear these rings’

Wedding rings are usually described as representing the endless of true love, having no beginning and no end.

Most people in Australia wear it on the fourth digit on the left hand. In ancient times it was thought that a vein ran directly from this finger to the heart.

No ring
Whilst wedding rings hold thousands of years of tradition, if they are meaningless to you – don’t make them part of your day. It’s your wedding and you really should have only the symbols that you find important.

Beautiful wedding rings often come with large price tags. You might find that at this stage in your life that money might be better spent on a holiday, house deposit or the wedding.

If you still want to exchange something; what about a necklace, watch or even get matching tattoos.

Like all rituals within a ceremony, a Wedding Ring only represents what you believe it stands for.

If it means something to you – then great; l know an awesome jeweller.

If a wedding ring is not for you – then let’s chat about what you do want in your wedding ceremony, because guess what ... you too can do whatever you want!

This week, Jennifer Aniston and Justin Theroux surprised guests with a wedding disguised as a birthday party. As reported by ET:

Whilst this doesn't sound like my idea of low key or minimum fuss, l have been involved in a many Surprise Weddings over the years and admit l am quite a fan. Here are a few reasons why:

You get to decide everything
We've all been there. Someone you know says “I'm getting married” and after the hugs and hi-fives comes the
 “l know a florist”,
 “you should use my make up artist”,
 “what ever you do, don’t (insert personal opinion here)”
What the happy couple see as their ideal way to get married get’s torn to strips and they are suddenly planning their parents/aunts/best friend’s perfect day.
When you keep it a surprise you get to decide the who, what and where. After all, it is Your Wedding. 

(Please note - when l say "Your Wedding" l mean you AND your fiancé. Weddings where one party to the marriage had no prior knowledge are against the law in Australia. The bride and groom need to both give 30 days notice and full consent.)

Reduce the drama
Ok – so l am not going to say that Surprise Weddings are without drama. But l will say that drama can be reduced by limiting the lead time people have to create it.
Make sure the important people will be there. This might mean spilling the beans to a stubborn parent or noncommittal friend to ensure they make the effort.
It probably goes without saying, but be realistic about whether any of your guests would be unhappy with your union. If there is doubt that someone would make a scene, would you really want them at your wedding anyway?

Low expectations
There are certain expectations we all have about attending a wedding. There will be food and refreshments. There will be some formal part. There will probably be a cake, flowers, seating arrangements, confetti, speeches, high-heels, first dance, beef or chicken and so on and so on. Without even realising, we all expect certain things when we attend a wedding.
However, if you think you are attending a housewarming or engagement party and all you expect is a sausage in bread and a beer or two – what a complete BONUS if you get to witness someone you love getting married.

I get quite invested in my couples big day, some say I shouldn't, but it breaks my heart when someone's wedding is marred by a supplier not doing the job they were hired for. I have been to so many weddings  and along the way I have learnt a lot about planning this special occasion. It is all about assembling a team of professionals around you that will show up and work for you.
Here are a few tips to help you to gather the suppliers that will help you to have the celebration you want:

Where did you find them?
A great way to find the best suppliers is to ask people you know and trust. If someone has had a celebration recently and loved their supplier find out who it was. Knowing the service and quality you receive before contacting a supplier gives you a starting point. For example, l am part of an awesome group of local wedding businesses and because l know them all personally, when l refer them to my couples l know exactly the high level of service they will receive.

Have you met them?
Researching and googling a business is one thing, but meeting them in person is so important. Businesses can and do write whatever they like on their website. Meeting a supplier in person can put a face to a voice/email but also helps you decide if they are the right person to be helping you with your day.

Did they impress you?
If the supplier turned up late, are forgetful or they wont take the time to meet you, then chances are you don't want them working for you. 

Do they do what you need done?
Everyone wants something different for their wedding so finding the supplier that can provide your preference is important. If you want glamorous wedding photos, you will need a different photographer than if you just want 100 photos on a usb. If you want a personalised ceremony, you will need a different celebrant than one that is happy to just insert your name into their script. 

I’ve booked them, what now?
After you have booked your supplier, don't feel bad if you want to ask lots of questions and being clear that your needs will be met. Get everything in writing so that there is no confusion on what is included and agreed on. Find out the timings of the task they are completing. For example, if your guests will be arriving at 6pm, confirm that the DJ needs to be set up by this time and find out how long their set up takes.

Touching base with your supplier regularly is a great way to ensure everything is on track. This could be as simple as following their Facebook page. Nothing would be more stressful than in the weeks, days or hours before your wedding discovering they are no longer in business or can’t be contacted.