It was my birthday last week (happy birthday to me) which is my one and only special day for the whole year. Mother’s Day is about my mum, mother in law and my two grandmothers. Christmas is about family and mainly the kids. Our 3rd child was born on our 10th Wedding Anniversary so even our anniversary is all about someone else. Many people chose to share their wedding anniversary and pick a date that is already significant. For others, there are other determining factors. Here are some things to consider when choosing your wedding date. SHARE Making an already significant date even more special is popular. The groom’s birthday is a good date, unlikely he will forget. A couple last year got hitched on his parent’s 40th wedding anniversary so it was a double celebration. As l mentioned we have since had a child on our wedding anniversary though it was already the date of two cousins’ birthdays, one of which chose to celebrate her 18th birthday at our wedding. If you are looking to share a date make sure you check with the other people it affects. For instance, it might be special for you to get married on your deceased grandma’s birthday but it might be a really sad day for others. SEASON Everything from the theme, activities, bouquets and attire you have in mind for your wedding can be affected by the season. So whilst there is no way to guarantee it won’t rain in January, you can choose a date for a season you like. Wedding season, typically October to April in Australia, is also the busiest so choosing an alternative might mean it is cheaper and the service providers you are after might be available. Growing up on a farm l knew it couldn’t be harvest time, cropping time or shearing time so if your work is seasonally make sure you don’t pick a time when you will be super busy and unable to take time off. SPOT Most people have a place in mind they want to get married and the availability of the ceremony location or reception venue can be the deciding factor when choosing a date. Often Saturdays at popular locations are booking out 12 months in advance but consider asking for a Sunday, Friday evening or midweek date, usually it is much cheaper. SPACE Long weekends and public holidays are great for weddings especially if you have interstate travellers attending. It can reduce the amount of time off guests need to take in order to attend and give the whole occasion a more relaxed feel. It’s good to remember that people book long weekend activities in advance, so get your ‘save the date’ and invites out nice and early. SYMBOLS Some of the busiest wedding dates are when the numbers look good 12/12/12, 11/12/13 and 1/4/14. Valentine’s Day is always fashionable and often people chose New Year’s for the whole 01/01 effect. In many cultures particular numbers or dates are significant. The number seven symbolizes "togetherness" and is a lucky number for relationships according to Chinese tradition. May is considered an unlucky month to be married. On a recent trip to Bali l discovered that Hindu’s consult an astrologer who analyses the couple’s star signs in relation to the moon and sun before giving them lucky times and dates for their wedding. April this year was a particularly fortunate phase of the moon in Bali and l saw more than 100 wedding celebrations and even got to attend one. Pick a date that special to you, suits your needs and works for most. In the end, anything can happen. Just ask the New Zealand couple last week who booked a registry office wedding for 11 days before their first baby was due only to end up in labour for the ceremony and welcoming their daughter 8 hours later; whose birthday will now forever share their anniversary. How did you choose your wedding date? Share, Season, Spot, Space, Symbols or Something Else?
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Inspired by a recent question from a bride and a bizarre story l read yesterday; l am sharing 7 ways to include children in your ceremony, without wearing them. I often perform weddings for people with offspring and l am always delighted by the joy shared when the whole family is involved. However, a woman in Tennessee chose to include her newborn in the ceremony by attaching the child to her wedding train and dragging her down the aisle. Each to their own though l would argue, there are 7 other ways to involve the kids by giving them: 1. Their own job Ring bearers, flower girls and ushers are all common roles for children. Walking nana or mum down the aisle is also special. If you are having an order of service make sure their name is there in black and white. My son was once given the job of ‘hat holder’ at his great uncles beach wedding and wore the title as a badge of honour all day. 2. Their own I dos When blending families or welcoming a new ‘parent figure’ it is symbolic to make a public vow to the child and a response from the child. They can say ‘I do’ and agree to support the marriage. 3. Their own paperwork A replica wedding certificate or similar document would be easy to create for the children to sign and keep as a reminder of their promises made. 4. Their own bling It can be frustrating for kids to see mum and dad scoring all the gifts, attention and new bling. A necklace, watch or other special reminder of the day can be presented to the children during the ring exchange. 5. Their own mini-ceremony Many weddings include a symbolic gesture of the union made such as pouring sand, lighting candles or planting trees. Children can be involved in these actions and it is a great way of keeping them interested in the day. 6. Their own stage More confident and older children can read poems, sing songs, play an instrument or read a special letter. I have seen 16 year olds completely freak out and 7 year olds read perfectly so this would definitely be depended on the child in question and their confidence level. Remember, there are many traditional sayings in a wedding that don’t need to be said by the celebrant. I would love to see an offspring shout “You may now kiss my mum” 7. Their own decorating Petals, balloons, rice and confetti; just some of the many things children can dole out or decorate with. My favourite is bubbles which not only seem to keep kids in a trance, but also make for fantastic wedding photos. Finally, a couple of tips. There is a reason ‘they’ say never work with kids or animals. It’s important that you don’t get disappointed or upset if the child refuses to go along with the plans on the day. Shyness, fear or control can cause the most confident rehearsed kid to freeze, cry or tantrum. The best way to avoid this is to not make their role pivotal to the whole ceremony and have someone else responsible to assist them on the day. The bride can’t run after an upset flowergirl. My biggest advice is ask the child what they would like to do. Know the kid. If they are nervous or not interested don’t make them. Forcing a tomboy into a lace dress or making a shy child centre of attention is just asking for trouble... and often a guaranteed entry for “funniest home videos”. Sewing them into the dress, now that will definitely get you on the news. I'd love to hear any other ways you've seen children successfully included in a wedding ceremony. Comment below
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